This tumblr is devoted to reviewing the films (and occasionally TV shows) available on Netflix Instant Queue.
This Week On Netflix
Duration: 82 Minutes
Rating: R
Score: 2/10 as a movie, 11/10 for bad movie hilariousness
Bet you weren’t expecting me to be doing reviews again, huh? Well, it’s alright. I wasn’t either. At least, until I saw an image for this movie on my Tumblr dashboard.
Had to see if it was actually a thing, and I was pleasantly surprised that the movie was not only real, but also on Netflix Instant Queue. So, I loaded up the ol’ PS3 for a look at this incredibly mixed bag of a movie.
Why is it a mixed bag? Oh, dear god, you’re about to find out.
So Rubber starts out with a message. A message that is apparently reached by a guy standing around with some large amount of binoculars, while a police car rolls up smashing through a bunch of chairs placed around a dirt road—okay, I’m sorry, I’m already lost. Why am I watching this? Who wrote this? Quentin…Dupieux? Who the hell is he?
This guy comes out of the trunk and starts on a rant about how so many movies have elements that occur for what is defined as “no reason.” And that’s just it. This movie embodies this entire message, which is why it’s so hilariously bad, and yet, in a strange way, ignoring the score I gave it, so intriguing. Things occur for what appears to be just as the movie intends them: no reason whatsoever. It’s an understandable message, yes, but at the same time, is that really what you’re going to write your movie about?
Let me try to give you some perspective as to the more finite details you’re going to encounter if you actually try to watch this…film. There’s this tire—named Robert, apparently?—that comes to life and rolls around destroying stuff as though it was its only purpose to exist. Why? We just don’t know. The movie tries to explain the tire’s motivations, but even then, they still don’t make sense.
On top of that, Rubber attempts to be a satire on a bunch of other stuff, such as theater audiences, the idiocy of movie villians, and so much more, to the point where it feels as though all of this information that has no real explanation to its purpose is just shoved down our throats. Which is Dupieux’s point, I’m aware…but it destroys an attempt to feel for his movie’s message. Things just happen or get expressed, and then it’s on to something else about the tire or some other point, and it weaves all around until I had to pause the movie to take a break and ponder it over pizza. That’s the first time I had to pause a movie on Netflix to make sense of it, ladies and gentlemen. I consider myself a pretty intelligent guy, but the writing is just…wow. I know it’s a satire, but come on.
That’s really what it comes down to in this movie. Dupieux’s writing a satire on a bunch of things. It’s like he’s doing a paper without a direct focus. He claims to have one, and you follow it, but then he goes on to a different topic, and drags you along with him as you flail around trying to go from point to point to point without losing any sort of information. It’s hard.

But that’s what makes it hilarious to watch, as well. You’re so confused and unattached from the movie that anything that happens suddenly just has you dying from laughter brought upon by sheer randomness. It’s like Dupieux made an 82-minute YouTube video that would get countless views simply because it’s so out there in terms of interpretation. Which is confounding in itself, because mind you, this movie had a budget. A BUDGET.
So, in summary, we’ve got a movie about a killer tire that’s attempting to satirize sensibility in movies without actually helping its own case. Everything makes so little sense that you come to expect in and feel set up to laugh at times, not that it prevents you from doing so at all. This movie is essentially Birdemic, but with tires. Seriously. Tiers are vastly superior to birds somehow. It’s in the movie. But I’d still recommend watching it if you ever have the itch to see something that requires thought processes on the levels of Inception and Enter the Void to understand.
Because Rubber will certainly do that to you.

View in High Quality →

Duration: 82 Minutes

Rating: R

Score: 2/10 as a movie, 11/10 for bad movie hilariousness

Bet you weren’t expecting me to be doing reviews again, huh? Well, it’s alright. I wasn’t either. At least, until I saw an image for this movie on my Tumblr dashboard.

Had to see if it was actually a thing, and I was pleasantly surprised that the movie was not only real, but also on Netflix Instant Queue. So, I loaded up the ol’ PS3 for a look at this incredibly mixed bag of a movie.

Why is it a mixed bag? Oh, dear god, you’re about to find out.

So Rubber starts out with a message. A message that is apparently reached by a guy standing around with some large amount of binoculars, while a police car rolls up smashing through a bunch of chairs placed around a dirt road—okay, I’m sorry, I’m already lost. Why am I watching this? Who wrote this? Quentin…Dupieux? Who the hell is he?

This guy comes out of the trunk and starts on a rant about how so many movies have elements that occur for what is defined as “no reason.” And that’s just it. This movie embodies this entire message, which is why it’s so hilariously bad, and yet, in a strange way, ignoring the score I gave it, so intriguing. Things occur for what appears to be just as the movie intends them: no reason whatsoever. It’s an understandable message, yes, but at the same time, is that really what you’re going to write your movie about?

Let me try to give you some perspective as to the more finite details you’re going to encounter if you actually try to watch this…film. There’s this tire—named Robert, apparently?—that comes to life and rolls around destroying stuff as though it was its only purpose to exist. Why? We just don’t know. The movie tries to explain the tire’s motivations, but even then, they still don’t make sense.

On top of that, Rubber attempts to be a satire on a bunch of other stuff, such as theater audiences, the idiocy of movie villians, and so much more, to the point where it feels as though all of this information that has no real explanation to its purpose is just shoved down our throats. Which is Dupieux’s point, I’m aware…but it destroys an attempt to feel for his movie’s message. Things just happen or get expressed, and then it’s on to something else about the tire or some other point, and it weaves all around until I had to pause the movie to take a break and ponder it over pizza. That’s the first time I had to pause a movie on Netflix to make sense of it, ladies and gentlemen. I consider myself a pretty intelligent guy, but the writing is just…wow. I know it’s a satire, but come on.

That’s really what it comes down to in this movie. Dupieux’s writing a satire on a bunch of things. It’s like he’s doing a paper without a direct focus. He claims to have one, and you follow it, but then he goes on to a different topic, and drags you along with him as you flail around trying to go from point to point to point without losing any sort of information. It’s hard.

But that’s what makes it hilarious to watch, as well. You’re so confused and unattached from the movie that anything that happens suddenly just has you dying from laughter brought upon by sheer randomness. It’s like Dupieux made an 82-minute YouTube video that would get countless views simply because it’s so out there in terms of interpretation. Which is confounding in itself, because mind you, this movie had a budget. A BUDGET.


So, in summary, we’ve got a movie about a killer tire that’s attempting to satirize sensibility in movies without actually helping its own case. Everything makes so little sense that you come to expect in and feel set up to laugh at times, not that it prevents you from doing so at all. This movie is essentially Birdemic, but with tires. Seriously. Tiers are vastly superior to birds somehow. It’s in the movie. But I’d still recommend watching it if you ever have the itch to see something that requires thought processes on the levels of Inception and Enter the Void to understand.

Because Rubber will certainly do that to you.

Duration: 143 minutes
Rating: NR
Score: ??/10
So, uh, Enter the Void.
This is a… weird movie. There’s really not much to it besides that.
Enter the Void is the story of Oscar, who lives in an apartment with his sister Linda in Japan. The movie is unconventional in that it is shot entirely from Oscar’s point of view. He makes a living dealing drugs while his sister makes a living as a stripper. The film begins in their apartment where Linda is leaving for work. Once she’s gone, Oscar decides to get high and the audience is treated to a hallucinogenic display, which I can only assume is accurate in its portrayal as the director himself has done drugs.
Some time later, Oscar’s friend Alex shows up to escort Oscar to a sale he is to make. On their way, Alex explains the Buddhist concept of death to Alex according to the Tibetan Book of the Dead, which Alex had lent Oscar. During the sale, things go bad when the police raid the place. While attempting to flush the drugs down a malfunctioning toilet, Oscar yells that he has a gun and will shoot if the police don’t back off.
Oscar is then shot through the heart and dies.
What follows is the absolute weirdest series of events I have ever seen on film. And I’ve seen Legend of Chun-li.
Oscar’s… “spirit,” I guess, begins by seeing the events that immediately preceded his death. After watching as the news is broken to his sister, his life begins to play out before his eyes. He relives his parents’ death in a car crash, being split up from his sister, moving to Japan, etc. etc. He then begins to see the fallout of his death and how it has affected his sisters and friends. The film concludes with a long take of Oscar’s “spirit” flying through the rooms of a Japanese love hotel, showing its patrons having sex as their genitals glow. It settles on Linda and Alex having sex and eventually switches to a shot of the sex from inside Linda’s vagina and follows Alex’s sperm as it travels to an egg. We then watch Oscar being “born” again from his perspective.
This film is… odd. It’s difficult to form a concrete opinion on it. It’s an incredibly innovative and image-heavy film to be sure, but unless you go into it with an open mind and not expecting a conventional film, you’re not likely to enjoy it. In fact, you’ll probably find it to be freaky as shit.
Frankly I’m not even sure if I’d say I “liked” it. It certainly was an interesting watch, yes, but I’m not sure if I really… enjoyed it? In the same way that a terribad movie is like watching a train wreck, Enter the Void is sort of like staring at a lava lamp. It’s really cool to watch the globs of goop flow up and down, but at the end of it all you’re not really sure if you got anything substantial out of it.
To that end I’ve left the score for this film ambiguous. There’s really no way I can fairly rate it because it’s not the kind of film you can hold up to the same standards you hold other films to.

View in High Quality →

Duration: 143 minutes

Rating: NR

Score: ??/10

So, uh, Enter the Void.

This is a… weird movie. There’s really not much to it besides that.

Enter the Void is the story of Oscar, who lives in an apartment with his sister Linda in Japan. The movie is unconventional in that it is shot entirely from Oscar’s point of view. He makes a living dealing drugs while his sister makes a living as a stripper. The film begins in their apartment where Linda is leaving for work. Once she’s gone, Oscar decides to get high and the audience is treated to a hallucinogenic display, which I can only assume is accurate in its portrayal as the director himself has done drugs.

Some time later, Oscar’s friend Alex shows up to escort Oscar to a sale he is to make. On their way, Alex explains the Buddhist concept of death to Alex according to the Tibetan Book of the Dead, which Alex had lent Oscar. During the sale, things go bad when the police raid the place. While attempting to flush the drugs down a malfunctioning toilet, Oscar yells that he has a gun and will shoot if the police don’t back off.

Oscar is then shot through the heart and dies.

What follows is the absolute weirdest series of events I have ever seen on film. And I’ve seen Legend of Chun-li.

Oscar’s… “spirit,” I guess, begins by seeing the events that immediately preceded his death. After watching as the news is broken to his sister, his life begins to play out before his eyes. He relives his parents’ death in a car crash, being split up from his sister, moving to Japan, etc. etc. He then begins to see the fallout of his death and how it has affected his sisters and friends. The film concludes with a long take of Oscar’s “spirit” flying through the rooms of a Japanese love hotel, showing its patrons having sex as their genitals glow. It settles on Linda and Alex having sex and eventually switches to a shot of the sex from inside Linda’s vagina and follows Alex’s sperm as it travels to an egg. We then watch Oscar being “born” again from his perspective.

This film is… odd. It’s difficult to form a concrete opinion on it. It’s an incredibly innovative and image-heavy film to be sure, but unless you go into it with an open mind and not expecting a conventional film, you’re not likely to enjoy it. In fact, you’ll probably find it to be freaky as shit.

Frankly I’m not even sure if I’d say I “liked” it. It certainly was an interesting watch, yes, but I’m not sure if I really… enjoyed it? In the same way that a terribad movie is like watching a train wreck, Enter the Void is sort of like staring at a lava lamp. It’s really cool to watch the globs of goop flow up and down, but at the end of it all you’re not really sure if you got anything substantial out of it.

To that end I’ve left the score for this film ambiguous. There’s really no way I can fairly rate it because it’s not the kind of film you can hold up to the same standards you hold other films to.

Duration: 88 minutes
Rating: NR
Score: 2/10
I’m going to ruin this movie for you, but don’t worry, it ruins itself in the first 15 minutes.
Mark is your average, kind of doofy looking guy who has had 5 failed relationships.  The movie opens with his most recent girlfriend dumping him because he can’t say the L word.  He is physically incapable to the point where he shoves food into his mouth to avoid saying it, much like those Twix commercials.  So, at this point, it seems to be pretty obvious that Mark is afraid of love.  Moving on…
Oh, wait.  Only the person watching knows that.  You have to wait about an hour for any of the characters to figure it out.  Great.
Mark has this thing where he takes up a new hobby every time a relationship ends.  This time he has decided on karate and goes to what he thinks is a class.  Turns out, it’s really a bunch of women trying to trick men into coming to their speed dating group by posting karate flyers around town.  (Seriously though, they couldn’t think of a better man-lure than karate?)  After “catching” Mark and explaining their plan, one of the women says, “The problem is, whenever it works, we can never get them to stay.”  I wonder why!?  Oh, maybe because you’re all crazy?  They are so desperate that they end up paying him $500 just to stick around for a bit and give them guy advice.  Need I remind you, these are adult women.
Mark retells the stories of his first 4 relationships, which are fantastic until the girlfriend wants to move to the next level and he is again incapable of telling them that he loves them.  It’s not until 46 minutes into the movie that one of the crazy ladies asks, “Are you afraid of falling in love?” DING DING DING, we have a winner!  Seriously, that’s the big thing.  He’s afraid of love.  They make it seem like this groundbreaking moment, when in reality, anyone with an IQ above 70 could figure it out in the first few minutes of the movie.
Mark ends up leaving because he is so uncomfortable with the fact that they have unearthed this deep dark secret that he has not even revealed to himself.
Skip ahead 15 minutes and he’s back, after having a revelation that he loves girlfriend #4 and decides to get her back.  And he does.  And they live happily ever after.  What a shocking ending.
The only reason I didn’t give it a rating of 1 is because there were a few laughs to be had.  For example, while watching a black and white movie, girlfriend #5 asks, “Is it going to change to color anytime soon?”  No.  Be less stupid.  That’s something I found myself saying throughout the majority of the movie.
Anyway, don’t watch this.  It’s predictable and rather boring.  Your time would be better spent thinking of ways that you could spend your time more wisely.

Duration: 88 minutes

Rating: NR

Score: 2/10

I’m going to ruin this movie for you, but don’t worry, it ruins itself in the first 15 minutes.

Mark is your average, kind of doofy looking guy who has had 5 failed relationships.  The movie opens with his most recent girlfriend dumping him because he can’t say the L word.  He is physically incapable to the point where he shoves food into his mouth to avoid saying it, much like those Twix commercials.  So, at this point, it seems to be pretty obvious that Mark is afraid of love.  Moving on…

Oh, wait.  Only the person watching knows that.  You have to wait about an hour for any of the characters to figure it out.  Great.

Mark has this thing where he takes up a new hobby every time a relationship ends.  This time he has decided on karate and goes to what he thinks is a class.  Turns out, it’s really a bunch of women trying to trick men into coming to their speed dating group by posting karate flyers around town.  (Seriously though, they couldn’t think of a better man-lure than karate?)  After “catching” Mark and explaining their plan, one of the women says, “The problem is, whenever it works, we can never get them to stay.”  I wonder why!?  Oh, maybe because you’re all crazy?  They are so desperate that they end up paying him $500 just to stick around for a bit and give them guy advice.  Need I remind you, these are adult women.

Mark retells the stories of his first 4 relationships, which are fantastic until the girlfriend wants to move to the next level and he is again incapable of telling them that he loves them.  It’s not until 46 minutes into the movie that one of the crazy ladies asks, “Are you afraid of falling in love?” DING DING DING, we have a winner!  Seriously, that’s the big thing.  He’s afraid of love.  They make it seem like this groundbreaking moment, when in reality, anyone with an IQ above 70 could figure it out in the first few minutes of the movie.

Mark ends up leaving because he is so uncomfortable with the fact that they have unearthed this deep dark secret that he has not even revealed to himself.

Skip ahead 15 minutes and he’s back, after having a revelation that he loves girlfriend #4 and decides to get her back.  And he does.  And they live happily ever after.  What a shocking ending.

The only reason I didn’t give it a rating of 1 is because there were a few laughs to be had.  For example, while watching a black and white movie, girlfriend #5 asks, “Is it going to change to color anytime soon?”  No.  Be less stupid.  That’s something I found myself saying throughout the majority of the movie.

Anyway, don’t watch this.  It’s predictable and rather boring.  Your time would be better spent thinking of ways that you could spend your time more wisely.

Anonymous: My friend and I watched Isolation, under horror. Its worth the watch.

Oh, thanks for the recommendation! I’ll pass it along to our chief horror expert (Gage).

Feb 28th at 6PM / reblog / 1 note

CALL FOR ADMINS

We could use some admins, as of this moment we have two people here to write the reviews.

If you’re interested, drop your tumblr e-mail in our ask box and I’ll put you on.

That’s it!

Thanks.

Feb 6th at 7PM / reblog / 1 note

CALL FOR ADMINS

We could use some admins, as of this moment we have two people here to write the reviews.

If you’re interested, drop your tumblr e-mail in our ask box and I’ll put you on.

That’s it!

Thanks.

Feb 6th at 7PM / reblog / 1 note

Anyone want to write some reviews for this blog? Tell us here! →

thisweekonnetflix:

Reposting this because I put this up at like 2AM and I doubt any of you saw it.

Rereposting because one of our admins has left due to a lack of time to devote to the blog and that means we could really use more help here.

C’mon, it’s fun!

Anyone want to write some reviews for this blog? Tell us here! →

Reposting this because I put this up at like 2AM and I doubt any of you saw it.

Duration: 86 minutes.
Rating: R.
Score: 7/10
All right, so, Smokin’ Aces 2!
This is by no means a cinematic masterpiece. Hell, I wouldn’t even call it a good film. But good god is it a fun one.
A bounty is put out an FBI desk jockey, Walter Weed. Nobody can seem to figure out why this bounty was put on him, but they do know he’s going to be dead soon if they don’t do something about it. So they start up a protection service for him.
We’re introduced to a colorful cast of assassins. There’s a femme fatale, a family of hillbilly killers, a torture specialist, and a crazed a master of disguise. They’re all after Weed and the $3 million bounty on his head.
Obviously, they clash. And it’s glorious.
This movie has a lot of obvious faults. The explosions look like they were done in Windows Movie Maker, for one. There are some obvious backdrop and editing errors.
But y’know what? This movie is fun. It’s pretty much an hour and a half of pure, unadulterated action. Guns and explosions and ridiculous shit everywhere. And it’s even pretty well acted. Is it the best movie like this out there? Not at all. But is it a good one? It is, yeah.
Give it a shot if you’ve got an hour and a half to kill.

Duration: 86 minutes.

Rating: R.

Score: 7/10

All right, so, Smokin’ Aces 2!

This is by no means a cinematic masterpiece. Hell, I wouldn’t even call it a good film. But good god is it a fun one.

A bounty is put out an FBI desk jockey, Walter Weed. Nobody can seem to figure out why this bounty was put on him, but they do know he’s going to be dead soon if they don’t do something about it. So they start up a protection service for him.

We’re introduced to a colorful cast of assassins. There’s a femme fatale, a family of hillbilly killers, a torture specialist, and a crazed a master of disguise. They’re all after Weed and the $3 million bounty on his head.

Obviously, they clash. And it’s glorious.

This movie has a lot of obvious faults. The explosions look like they were done in Windows Movie Maker, for one. There are some obvious backdrop and editing errors.

But y’know what? This movie is fun. It’s pretty much an hour and a half of pure, unadulterated action. Guns and explosions and ridiculous shit everywhere. And it’s even pretty well acted. Is it the best movie like this out there? Not at all. But is it a good one? It is, yeah.

Give it a shot if you’ve got an hour and a half to kill.